chris has written 43 reviews with an average rating of 6.4.
chris particularly enjoyed Aliens (1986)
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Just picture frank bruno dressed in womens underwear, walking around st johns shopping centre, giving out free greggs sausage and baked bean pasties singing 'something kind of oooh' by girls aloud. Well this film is madder.
Cowardly Private Hudson steals it for me 'with those things running round outside you can count me out'.
The cinematic equivalent of an episode of 'come dine with me' featuring Alan Shearer, the Neville brothers, the eggheads quiz team and Carol Vorderman.
Starts off slow but the terror increases steadily throughout... The fact a child is in grave danger makes it more scary... And the ending is proper clever... Better than the first.
Would rather spend 90 minutes with the Talibans most adept torturer than watch this again.
More enjoyable than a threesome with 2 lesbian twin sisters.
If you thought aragorn was hard in lord of the rings get on to him here with his cock out despatching cockney gangsters...brutal.
'Swing away Merrill', fucking ace, the noise of the aliens is as scary as waking up realising you have just had unprotected sex with an Johannesburg brass.
The only children in the entire world who could possibly like this are Bill Oddie's... I would rather put my kids in the hands of a nonce ring than let them endure this again.
Fucking excellent film. Maggie Thatcher was a cunt.
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